At least on my monitor…
… the protosprog animation on my site is just about life-size this week.
I have spent longer than I care to admit holding my hands up to the spooky little critter to admire it. Pretended to pat its little head. Warned it to look at me when I’m talking to it.
Ultrasound tomorrow. I’m, um, looking forward to it? Dreading it? Abso-fucking-lutely terrified?
Um, yes to all of the above.
As if to remind me that my weight and what I put into my mouth are not entirely connected these days, I lost a pound yesterday despite having shoveled huge quantities of fried cassava and fried plantain and Russian donuts into my mouth.
Other symptoms continuing as per what’s-becoming-normal. I have a swollen lymph gland in one armpit, which I remember having for most of my first doomed pregnancy – and which went away rather quickly once the pregnancy is over. I say, keep it up, little over-reactive lymph gland! Though I will, of course, mention it to the midwife when I see her in a couple of weeks.
(Look at me making assumptions like that! I didn’t even qualify the statement with “Assuming everything goes well tomorrow” So proud of myself!)
Actually, that last is because I really am assuming everything will go well tomorrow. Foolish though that assumption may be, everything still feels on track to me. Getting up to pee in the night is a major drag, but it’s better than running to the bathroom while still half asleep, convinced I’m going to yeccch. The nightmares suck. Last night they all centered on the Boy deciding he really couldn’t stand to be around me anymore. That was awful. Boobs are still sore and dark and generally making nuisances of themselves. The Hunger continues, as does the Thirst, but both are complicated by the fact that nothing sounds worthy of consumption these days. Sparkling water is nasty. Tap water is nasty. Soda is ok, but too sweet for everyday consumption. Food, in general, is nasty. Especially bread. Salad is ok if someone else makes it. Meat is good – if someone else makes it. Spicy Indian food is still just about my only go-to-meal, and I have a feeling I’m going to get tired of that sooner or later.
Hope it’s after I’ve gone through the 15 or so meals I brought to work the other day. Indian food in a box – you have to love the concept.
So really, I’m just in a holding pattern, waiting for tomorrow’s appointment and wondering what to eat that will not gag me. And who said pregnancy was boring!
Wave to protosprog on your way out and tell me if it’s ignoring you, too.
I’m sorry but your protosprog is really creepy – I can’t wait for it to start looking more human!! Good luck with the ultrasound tomorrow – I’m hoping the real thing looks better than your ticker!!
Assuming is all we can do! I have an appt today and I cant think of anything other than “good report” “good report” “good report”. Fingers crossed that we both have good reports!
Protosprog told me to :take a number!” And then “talk to the arm bud!”
What a cheeky little sprog!
I think that G over at Mission Impossible, calls her twins saag and naan because that was all she could stomach at some point.
I’ll be checking in obsessivly!
talk to the arm bud—- ahh ha ha ha oh Sarah, that is really funny
and yes, he/she is not that interested in waving at me either. So I wouldn’t take it personally.
And you– sweet neurotic you, yes, this is hard as it is good, sometimes harder than good since this is the invisible stage, and I wish on you nothing but peaceful joy at the same time knowing nothing could be farther from possible.
this whole thing, the WHOLE thing, is just so hard. Even when we win. I’m thinking of you and will be keeping my everythings crossed that tomorrow brings unequivocal great news and a new photo.
warmly,
Kate
Hi — here by way of i-can’t-whistle, and just wanted to pass along this link http://www.visembryo.com/baby/ (which you’ve probably already seen, but maybe not). Good luck tomorrow, I hope it goes really well.
Elizabeth
Good luck tomorrow. I’ll say a special prayer tonight for you and the sprog for a great photo session. I thought it was waving at me and then I realized it was just the too creepy umbilical cord (shudder). It think it would be great if it were life sized only so by the end it would take up the whole monitor screen – scroll bars and all!
It didn’t wave back at me either…
I am really proud of you for not qualifying that statement. Go Susan!! Nice going on the spicy Indian food. See… only if you were living close to me, I would have gladly cooked you some spicy Indian food! And I really hope that everything WILL go well tomorrow.
I have a strange HUGE boil in my ear and have since Saturday…
also been feverishly hot. can’t wait till my expected period. whenever that will be. I hope it’s not there and stops. my last cycle was 30 days and the period only lasted 3 days so I guess I’ll be waiting at least 30 days till I test. Today is day 16 i believe.
I’m so happy for you and hope that this pregnancy will be everything you drempt of and more!!!
Thinking of you all day today. Can’t wait for an update…
I have been thinking of you as well and I will be doing some stalking of my own to see how your u/s goes. God, please let this be it for us.