Negative HPT.  Again.  As decisively negative as any terrified 16-year-old should ever hope to see.   Nothing took.  Three picture-perfect embryos & not one of them managed to hang on for a week.  Which means they were probably not, actually picture-perfect, but rather of such poor quality that the ones we were able to freeze [...]

Nope.  Nothing good to report.  Negative HPT.  Wish I could just have the damned beta test tomorrow to get it done with, because, yes, I’ll still test each morning, and I’ll keep stabbing myself with the needles of pain each night, and I’ll ingest the fucking prednisone (which prescription I’ll need to renew on Monday [...]

I have a very faint positive on the HPT test I took this morning. Oh god oh god oh god oh god. Standard disclaimer here: I went out and bought expensive pregnancy tests because I’ve been leery about how fast the HCG shot appeared to leave my system using the internet-cheapies I’ve been obsessively peeing [...]

And I’m still obsessing. About anything/everything. Took an HPT test today, knowing it’s too early by any standards, but still unable to help myself. So another snowy white test strip is lined up next to its compare-to buddies in the meds. cupboard. And I’m trying to remind myself that a negative test right now is [...]

…and trying desperately to make it be from implantation, rather than, say, gas. Because gas would be, um, anti-climatic. And so in pursuit of this lofty goal, I spent much of today – when I should have been working – googling things like “4dp2dt cramps implantation” And, sure enough. Lots of women in my position [...]

Besides being a day in which the windows are still being replaced. It’s rather like living in an Alice-in-Wonderland set, actually. Much busy-ness, no progress. Or so it seems. Realistically, I know they must be accomplishing something, but three weeks without being able to sleep in is taking a toll on me. Not to mention [...]